Brood II

by Stacie on May 9, 2013

They’re back.

After 17 years of living underground feeding from tree roots, the cicada nymphs have started to emerge – butt first.  Their breech arrival isn’t written anywhere that I’ve seen. But I have powerful observation skills as a trained scientist. And every single one I’ve seen comes out like this:

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I read that they emerge when the ground temperature reaches exactly 64 degrees Fahrenheit. How do they know that?

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Soon, they will be all over the ground. They will climb up trees, pupate, and hatch into sex-starved red-eyed flies (you can just see the red eye on the nymph above).

They will breed and lay eggs that will hatch into little nymphs who will burrow back into the ground, grow, and eat tree juice for the next 17 years until it’s their turn to have sex.

It’s a living, I guess.

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I’m hanging out at the yeah write moonshine grid. There’s plenty to go around. Check it out!

{ 44 comments }

All Of It

by Stacie on April 30, 2013

She traded it all for a silver kiss.

She’d tried to resist, but in the end she just couldn’t.

Jimmy was 12, a big 6th grader. Jimmy got kisses every day, and she’d never had one at all. He’d seen her looking at him for weeks.

Finally, he’d approached her after school, startling her by jumping out from behind a weeping willow as she walked home along the river.

“I’ll give you a kiss if you take off your clothes,” he smiled.

She hesitated. Mama would never allow it, she’d be so mad. But she wanted that kiss more than anything.

Finally, after thinking about it for a full 5 minutes, she slipped out of her worn shoes and torn socks, shimmied out of her hand-me-down dress and tossed them at Jimmy’s feet. Standing there in her slip, she extended her hand and waited for her kiss.

“All of it,” he stated, as he looked her up and down.

“I can’t,” she cried, “Why isn’t this good enough?”

“All of it,” he repeated, “or no kiss.”

Reluctantly, she pulled the slip over her head and tossed it at Jimmy’s feet too.

“All of it.”

Oh no. She’d come so close, she just couldn’t let the kiss go now. She was practically naked anyway, and she could just taste that sweet kiss. Her panties joined the pile. She stood by the river, feeling as vulnerable as she was naked.

Jimmy laughed as he scooped up her clothes and turned to walk away.

“Hey, what about my kiss?!!” She yelled frantically. “A deal’s a deal!”

“Oh yeah, here you go Fido!” he mocked, tossing a handful of Hershey’s kisses to the ground.

No longer aware of her nakedness, she scrambled towards the kisses and gathered them from the ground.

Six whole kisses.

She sat down on a smooth boulder, peeled the foil wrapper off of one and popped it into her mouth. The kiss felt huge in her mouth, and she nearly passed out from the sweet nirvana, the rich chocolatey taste permeating her every fiber. Saliva welled up and leaked out. She wiped it off, smearing milk chocolate across her face. The next one, she savored, taking teeny tiny bites such that most of the chocolate ended up on her fingers. Licking it off, she decided to eat the others the first way.

Oh yeah, Mama was going to be mad. They didn’t have much money, certainly not enough to replace her clothes.

But she no longer cared.

Her first kisses were so sweet, and nothing could take that away.

speakeasy 107

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I’m hanging out with my favorite fiction and poetry peeps. This week, we had to refer to the photo in some way and start with “She traded it all for a silver kiss.” Come join us at the yeah write speakeasy!

{ 38 comments }

Efficiencies in Banking

April 23, 2013

When Rich and I walked into the bank, we were relieved to see a dozen smiling employees (4 tellers and 8 others) and only one customer. Two weeks had already passed since we’d received a document requiring notarization. Our crazy schedules hadn’t allowed the both of us to get to a notary during the week because, [...]

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Google Me Q113

April 12, 2013

Once per quarter, I amuse myself by looking at the Google search terms that led to my blog. And then I blog about it so I can laugh again. Rated R: I can’t find my blog in the first 5 pages when I search all but one of these terms, so I’m baffled as to [...]

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50 Shades Of Fitness Faboosh

April 6, 2013

Last August, when I embarked on my greater than year-long 50 Shades of Fitness goals to be in my best-shape ever (whatever that is) by my 50th birthday, I promised monthly updates. My last update was January, oops. Obviously, I haven’t been perfect with the updates. It’s not because I haven’t wanted to, I just got [...]

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Mainstreaming

April 2, 2013

I panicked inwardly when I saw the list, my wards for the field trip to the Liberty Science Center. Oh no, not Peter. Keeping track of five third graders in a large multi-floor museum was daunting enough, even without Peter. I wasn’t sure I had the tools to handle this child, who two years before [...]

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Silent Night

April 1, 2013

The sun was setting when she finally arrived home, if you could call it that. Darla unlocked the van and slid open the side door, allowing her shepherd mix, Wolf, to jump in first before climbing in herself. She’d barely made it this time, she thought, shivering as she swung the door back in place [...]

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Carrie Bradshaw Made My Ponytail Uncool

March 26, 2013

I have never been a fashionista. In part, that’s because I didn’t inherit the gene. But it’s also true that most of the time I’d rather be comfortable than stylish. Now that I don’t need to don business casual attire for work, I spend most of the day in workout clothes until I manage to [...]

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10 Reasons It Doesn’t Feel Like Spring In NJ

March 23, 2013

It’s officially spring. Everyone’s got spring fever, but it sure doesn’t feel like spring in NJ. 1.   It’s still cold. Not just chilly but cold enough to snow last Saturday. And it’s gonna snow Monday-today. I mean, C’MON! 2.   Although baseball has started, it doesn’t feel like spring when my son pitches in [...]

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Rules (And Giveaway Winner)

March 22, 2013

If you know me at all, you know I’m kind of a stickler for rules. It’s not that I never broke any rules growing up, not by a long shot. I didn’t make my bed every day. I went cubing on the Stanford Golf Course and swimming at the Stanford pool after hours on more [...]

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